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This year is not starting off *quite* the way I wanted it to.
So far, none of the problems are with my classes, aside from the heaviness of the workload. I'm in two 200-level literature seminars, one of which is in French (!). The workload for my fiction course is actually arbitrary--as long as I turn in a story every week, it doesn't matter how long they are--but considering my propensity for writing rather long stories, it's going to take up quite a bit of time.
It's not a totally unmanageable workload if I don't waste time socializing constantly. Having a single makes this slightly easier, as does not actually sharing a central social group with all my housemates. My lack of discipline in turning down social invitations is making it a little harder, especially considering all my graduated friends no longer have this "homework" business, and once they get out of work they just have free time every night. I need to get better at remembering when I don't actually have free time just because I'm not in class, rather than just getting resentful of my friends because they want to hang out, which is not nice of me.
Oh, and I'm on three e-boards. That will take up time, too.
Hopefully, it is not such an heavy workload that I will not be able to still have *some* social life when I start working again. There is the slight issue that I don't know when or where that will actually be... the issue of me doing a couple hours a week at Hanover is still up in the air, until someone over there feels like making a decision (I do not understand how it's such a successful company... the people there are not very organized. I spent half my summer getting paid to play KoL because nobody had stuff for me to do, or paid any attention to where I was or if I was doing anything). I'm still with EventTemps; I decided to not work up through this weekend, but then I'll start picking shifts up again. Provided they are not "must drive self" shifts, because I don't have my car; I'll get to that in a minute. I'm still sort of half-assedly looking for a bartending job, but this week or two have been more focused on readjusting to school, since school is here, and I don't have flexible enough transit to actually be able to get most places where I could be seeking employment (yes, I know you've probably heard me go over this a billion times. I'm just annoyed 'cos it was supposed to be fixed by now).
I... still have no car. I brought it up two or three weeks ago, and Dad decided to hang onto it for a bit and only let me drive it when he was there because I'm not used to city driving, don't know my way around Worcester all that well except for my immediate area, &c &c, other things that could be fixed by having me drive more (or use Google Maps. It exists for a reason). Then we discovered that he'd never put me on the car insurance, so it's illegal for me to drive the damn thing anyway. So now I just have to wait for Dad to talk to his agent, which will take... I don't know how long. So I get to sit around and fidget that there's nothing I can do even though I'm the one this is important to, for I don't know how long. Mom is so pissed she's considering buying me another car (one that works, she keeps saying), which would be awesome, except that that would take a couple weeks too, and the drama bomb that would go off between my parents as a result of this power play would probably have me taking said car and hiding out in the Midwest for a couple of centuries until it blows over. But it would so be worth it, because every time I have to wait for a bus, or face the notion of paying for a cab, or try to schedule my grocery shopping around someone else being able to give me a ride, remembering that this was supposed to be over by now and there's nothing I can do about it but wait for other people to decide it's important enough to fix makes me want to kill cute fuzzy animals.
I hate being dependent, and I hate *being kept* dependent unnecessarily.
I'm also kind of afraid Dad will decide that adding me to the insurance costs too much and will just get rid of the car, like there have been four or five possible reasons he might have to do anyway that he's thrown at me over the course of the past several months.
I just. Want. To work. And to eat. And to have a bit of autonomy, so that I can manage my limited time and money in the most effective ways possible, because I am rapidly becoming a very, very busy person.
That being said, I should wrap this up so I can get some French homework done before class, because I have two club meeting after class, and I need to clean the kitchen (it was supposed to be done yesterday but our water was off all day, what fun), and then I probably need to do more homework. And some homework after that.
Edit: Also, it's "Patriot Day." Which irks the hell out of me. It's SEPTEMBER 11TH, dammit, and September 11th scared the shit out of me when it happened, and I will never quite get used to having a billion club meetings and shit scheduled on it like it's just another day. And there are just *so* many things wrong with calling it "Patriot" day in particular that I don't think I will *ever* not be angry seeing it in a calendar. Also, considering what a *huge* deal it was when it happened, and what a *huge* deal everyone made of it after one year, it bothers me that the actual remembrance of a ton of people dying bit has fallen off into almost nothing, and only the political fallout is left.
So far, none of the problems are with my classes, aside from the heaviness of the workload. I'm in two 200-level literature seminars, one of which is in French (!). The workload for my fiction course is actually arbitrary--as long as I turn in a story every week, it doesn't matter how long they are--but considering my propensity for writing rather long stories, it's going to take up quite a bit of time.
It's not a totally unmanageable workload if I don't waste time socializing constantly. Having a single makes this slightly easier, as does not actually sharing a central social group with all my housemates. My lack of discipline in turning down social invitations is making it a little harder, especially considering all my graduated friends no longer have this "homework" business, and once they get out of work they just have free time every night. I need to get better at remembering when I don't actually have free time just because I'm not in class, rather than just getting resentful of my friends because they want to hang out, which is not nice of me.
Oh, and I'm on three e-boards. That will take up time, too.
Hopefully, it is not such an heavy workload that I will not be able to still have *some* social life when I start working again. There is the slight issue that I don't know when or where that will actually be... the issue of me doing a couple hours a week at Hanover is still up in the air, until someone over there feels like making a decision (I do not understand how it's such a successful company... the people there are not very organized. I spent half my summer getting paid to play KoL because nobody had stuff for me to do, or paid any attention to where I was or if I was doing anything). I'm still with EventTemps; I decided to not work up through this weekend, but then I'll start picking shifts up again. Provided they are not "must drive self" shifts, because I don't have my car; I'll get to that in a minute. I'm still sort of half-assedly looking for a bartending job, but this week or two have been more focused on readjusting to school, since school is here, and I don't have flexible enough transit to actually be able to get most places where I could be seeking employment (yes, I know you've probably heard me go over this a billion times. I'm just annoyed 'cos it was supposed to be fixed by now).
I... still have no car. I brought it up two or three weeks ago, and Dad decided to hang onto it for a bit and only let me drive it when he was there because I'm not used to city driving, don't know my way around Worcester all that well except for my immediate area, &c &c, other things that could be fixed by having me drive more (or use Google Maps. It exists for a reason). Then we discovered that he'd never put me on the car insurance, so it's illegal for me to drive the damn thing anyway. So now I just have to wait for Dad to talk to his agent, which will take... I don't know how long. So I get to sit around and fidget that there's nothing I can do even though I'm the one this is important to, for I don't know how long. Mom is so pissed she's considering buying me another car (one that works, she keeps saying), which would be awesome, except that that would take a couple weeks too, and the drama bomb that would go off between my parents as a result of this power play would probably have me taking said car and hiding out in the Midwest for a couple of centuries until it blows over. But it would so be worth it, because every time I have to wait for a bus, or face the notion of paying for a cab, or try to schedule my grocery shopping around someone else being able to give me a ride, remembering that this was supposed to be over by now and there's nothing I can do about it but wait for other people to decide it's important enough to fix makes me want to kill cute fuzzy animals.
I hate being dependent, and I hate *being kept* dependent unnecessarily.
I'm also kind of afraid Dad will decide that adding me to the insurance costs too much and will just get rid of the car, like there have been four or five possible reasons he might have to do anyway that he's thrown at me over the course of the past several months.
I just. Want. To work. And to eat. And to have a bit of autonomy, so that I can manage my limited time and money in the most effective ways possible, because I am rapidly becoming a very, very busy person.
That being said, I should wrap this up so I can get some French homework done before class, because I have two club meeting after class, and I need to clean the kitchen (it was supposed to be done yesterday but our water was off all day, what fun), and then I probably need to do more homework. And some homework after that.
Edit: Also, it's "Patriot Day." Which irks the hell out of me. It's SEPTEMBER 11TH, dammit, and September 11th scared the shit out of me when it happened, and I will never quite get used to having a billion club meetings and shit scheduled on it like it's just another day. And there are just *so* many things wrong with calling it "Patriot" day in particular that I don't think I will *ever* not be angry seeing it in a calendar. Also, considering what a *huge* deal it was when it happened, and what a *huge* deal everyone made of it after one year, it bothers me that the actual remembrance of a ton of people dying bit has fallen off into almost nothing, and only the political fallout is left.
